Sometimes, women unintentionally sabotage themselves when navigating the dating world. Many are so eager to move from dating straight to the altar that they forget some essential rules of dating. It’s crucial to remember that dating is a process—it’s the time when you meet people and get to know them better. There are important steps to follow before jumping into a relationship with someone.
Here are the top 10 mistakes women make when dating:
Getting Intimate Too Soon
Yes, this isn’t the 1960s, and yes, we’ve heard of women’s liberation. We all have needs, but it’s important to be smart about them. If you choose to sleep with someone on the first or second date, that’s your decision, but be prepared for the relationship to go nowhere fast. Forming a deep connection before getting intimate is crucial, especially if you want a meaningful relationship. It may be unfair that a double standard still exists, but it does. Think about it—if public figures like Rihanna can be judged harshly for their choices, what makes you any different? Besides, most women tend to form emotional attachments after being intimate, which can complicate things early on.
Having Sex Without Protection
It’s shocking, but yes, some people still have unprotected sex with partners they aren’t in committed, monogamous relationships with. Think about the number of STDs and unplanned pregnancies that occur every day. Even with all the information and education available, some still allow physical desires to override logic. Always use protection, or you might find yourself dealing with unintended consequences, whether it’s a pregnancy or worse.
Having Sex Without a Commitment
If you and your partner have not had “The Talk”, you shouldn’t get busy between the sheets. Most women commit to the man they’re sleeping with and become upset when they find out he’s sleeping with other women. If you haven’t discussed your relationship’s current and future status, don’t blame him for not reading your mind. If you want a relationship, talk about it. What leverage do you have for this man to commit to you? He will feel as if he’s already getting the goods, there’s no need to commit to a relationship with you and he can continue to date whoever else comes along. What will happen if you become pregnant? Are you prepared to become a single mother? A lot of stress can be avoided if discussions are held before getting busy.
Assuming He’s Monogamous
If you and your partner haven’t had “The Talk” about exclusivity, it’s not wise to take things to the bedroom. Many women commit emotionally to the men they sleep with and later feel hurt when they find out those men are seeing other people. Without a clear conversation about where the relationship stands, don’t assume exclusivity. If you want a committed relationship, communicate it openly. Men often see no reason to commit if they’re already getting everything they want without the commitment. And think long-term—what would happen if you became pregnant? Are you prepared for the possibility of single motherhood? A lot of heartache can be avoided by having this conversation upfront.
Cancelling Plans with Friends and Family Just to See Him
Stop acting desperate. If you already have plans with your friends or family, don’t cancel them just because he wants to hang out. Trust me—he won’t do the same for you. Men often test boundaries, and if you always make yourself available to him, he’ll start taking you for granted. A good man values a woman who has her own life and interests. Plus, friends and family are forever—men? Not always.
Hiding Your True Self, Hoping He Will Like You
Pretending to be someone you’re not in order to please him will only backfire. If you hate football but pretend to love it just to spend time with him, or if you change your eating habits to align with his preferences, you’re not being authentic. Differences are what make people interesting. If you’re hiding who you truly are, it’s a sign that you may be with the wrong person. You should feel confident in being yourself, and if he’s the right person for you, he’ll appreciate you for who you are. Many men lose interest when they see their partners change—often because the person they fell for was hiding their true self all along.
Dating Only One Person Before Committing and Committing Too Early
Dating is supposed to be fun, a chance to meet different people and see who you connect with. By committing to one person too quickly, you risk wasting time on the wrong guy. While you’re wrapped up with Mr. Wrong, you could be missing out on Mr. Right. Also, dating multiple people at once helps you stay objective, allowing you to cut ties with the wrong guys more easily. Everyone is on their best behavior in the first few months of dating, and it takes time to uncover potential red flags like criminal history, gambling problems, or conflicting life goals.
Acting Like a Wife, When You’re Barely His Girlfriend
This is a common scenario—women start playing the role of a wife far too soon, cooking, cleaning, and running errands for a man who hasn’t committed. All this does is give the man a free ride—he gets the benefits of a wife without committing to one. While it’s fine to do nice things for someone, save the “wifely” duties for after you’ve both made a real commitment. As the saying goes, why buy the cow when you’re getting the milk for free?
Falling In Love Too Quickly
Some people believe you can’t control who you fall in love with. While that may be true to an extent, following some basic guidelines can prevent you from falling in love with the wrong person. Take your time, get to know them, and avoid acting out of desperation. Not every man you meet deserves your heart. Focus on dating men who meet your standards and are emotionally and financially stable.
Ignoring the Red Flags
This may be the most important point. If you notice any red flags—such as abusive behavior, infidelity, or irresponsibility—leave immediately. Men rarely change unless they want to, and no amount of praying or making excuses for him will change that. The warning signs are often there from the start, but out of desperation or loneliness, some women ignore them. Don’t give second chances when it comes to red flags. If your intuition tells you something is off, trust it and walk away.
By avoiding these common mistakes, you can approach dating with confidence and clarity, ensuring that you attract the right partner while protecting your own heart and well-being.
Leave a Reply